Beauty (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, #20.5)

Published in: 2012
Pages: 33
Edition read: E-book
Book #: Book 20.5 in the Anita Blake series

Book description:
With a vampire like Jean Claude around, it’s far too easy for Anita Blake to doubt her own appearance—and the hold it has on those who love her. But one hot tub and two incredibly sexy men—Jean Claude and Asher—will make her feel like the most lusted-after woman alive…or undead. Not bad for a mere human…

My review:
Why am I making this 33 page novella a whole review? Why, when it is actually 17 pages of story and then the remaining pages are the first chapter of the next book in the series? Why?

Because it is so bad, it needs it’s own entry.

If you have never read an Anita Blake book before, and are going “why are you so against this series? What is the big issue?” I recommend you read book 1, then read this. You will understand. You will read book 1, fall in love with this kickass series and decent characters, and then you read this drivel and go “WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?”

This novella is literally 1 scene. It’s Anita, Jean Claude, and Asher having a bath/fuck scene. That is it. It is bullshit, it’s filler between stories, it clearly could have been in any of the past 10 books as a chapter, but no. It has it’s own special novella and placement within the series and it’s things like this that make me realise 1) Laurell has ran out of storylines, 2) her publisher is pushing her to release more shit, and 3) this is her response.

I apologise for the language within this review, but it’s really called for. If Laurell has truly ran out of storylines or is sick of writing about Anita, then let the series end. Don’t keep trying to write it, just end it. Your readers will thank you, and you will be freed up to write other things. I mean, she has the talent, clearly, to write amazing stories. This is not one of them.

Final review:
Beauty rating:
1/10.
Would I re-read it? No, why would I bother? I already wasted 10 minutes reading this, I’m not going to bother wasting another 10 minutes on it.
Who would I recommend it to? Just…no. No recommendation.

Links:
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/13549145-beauty

Look, if you are curious about this novella, may I suggest that instead of buying it (like many of the Goodreads community did) but instead, either find a copy of read online for free, or download that shit illegally. Honestly, Laurell was at one point charging nearly $3 for the pleasure of reading this book, which is fucked.

 

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