Danse Macabre (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, #14)

Published in: 2006
Pages: 517
Edition read: Online book
Book #: Book 14 in the Anita Blake series

Book description:
These days, Anita Blake is less interested in vampire politics than in an ancient, ordinary dread she shares with women down the ages: she may be pregnant. And, if she is, whether the father is a vampire, a werewolf, or someone else entirely, he knows perfectly well that being a Federal Marshal known for raising the dead and being a vampire executioner, is no way to bring up a baby.

My review:
Ok so Anita might be pregnant, which is a big deal. However, the fact that this entire story is 500 pages and at least 200 of them are Anita discussing the potential pregnancy with her harem of lovers… and then there’s maybe 100 of sex scenes and sexual feelings, and 200 of Anita dealing with “metaphysical shit”… there’s not much room left over for the story. The story was what interested me- a vampire dance troupe coming to town, which means a lot of Masters of the City are visiting the city too. That is interesting stuff right there, how will they interact, how will a vampire dance troupe work? But no, that story shows up only every now and then. Instead, we get Anita having a freak out over maybe being pregnant, her lovers finding out, and instead of her going and whizzing on a stick to find out if she is or not, they just discuss it. They fight over it. I mean, a lot of things can be discussed AFTER you learn whether or not it’s a thing or not. Anita’s not pregnant? No more discussion. She is? Then discuss away. But don’t spend hundreds of pages discussing you mgiht be and what you might do, while holding an un-whizzed-on-pregnancy-test. I mean, just do it already. Urgh.

These books have gotten really tedious to read. The sex scenes are over the top and unnecessary, and most of the books are just Anita talking with her lovers or whinging about them, or the metaphysical stuff, which is dull to read about. There is no zombie raising, no police work, nothing of the original books in this story.

Final review:
Danse Macabre rating:
6.5/10.
Would I re-read it? Maybe, but probably not. Like I said, it was tedious to read through, and the story itself only shows up every now and then.
Who would I recommend it to? Fans of the book series, who have reluctantly accepted that this series is no longer what it once was and will never be that way again. Sigh.

Links:
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/121927.Danse_Macabre
Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danse_Macabre_%28novel%29
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Danse-Macabre-Anita-Vampire-Hunter/dp/0515142816
Authors website: http://www.laurellkhamilton.org/works/anita-blake/danse-macabre/

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